Examples of self-hate

I have heard it remarked that Jews who own Volkswagens are self-hating. I would like to add to the controversial list of self-haters with two more recent entries:

• M. Night Shyamalan - You are an Asian American director who has chosen to bring to the big screen a well-loved animated series that bases itself on Asian culture. The obvious answer is to cast Asian actors, but no, you choose white actors for every major role with the exception of the villain.
  
• Geeks who enjoy "The Big Bang Theory" - Geekdom is finally cool because geeks like Joss Whedon and Sam Raimi are in control. Yet, you choose to watch a sitcom that depicts geeks as socially awkward caricatures. Sure, the characters make geeky references but why not watch a comedy that makes references that only you would understand and respects you in the process? Try "Chuck" or "The IT Crowd".

The lost weekend

Faced with the prospect of a weekend without anything scheduled, Joe and I started racking our brains for possible activities: snowboarding, buying a snowboard, visiting friends, what to do?

As Saturday loomed, our stressed increased and we found ourselves wide awake on Saturday morning, ready to do something. I thought of exercising and decided to have a sensible breakfast in preparation. Somewhere between pouring the milk over the All Bran and putting the cereal bowl in the sink, I started playing Dragon Age: Origins. The end.

It was quite delightful to lose myself in a PC game with only a definite end time of Sunday night. Fortunately, unlike hard core Korean Starcraft players, we took breaks to eat, sleep and watch movies such as:

9 - To be clear, we watched the animated film about a post-apocalyptic world and not the musical about a libidinous filmmaker. 9 does a good job of setting up a depressing future and characters to root for, but offers little else. The characters are stereotypical and underdeveloped, and the climax is muted because if the resolution had followed logic, it should have been more ruthless. An entertaining movie that ultimately disappoints by not going as far as it should have.

Zombieland - While 9's muted reception was understandable after viewing, Zombieland's lack of popularity is surprising. This is as good of a zombie film as Shaun of the Dead, with a loser protagonist most fanboys can relate to, and all the hilarity that encounters with the undead can bring. Woody Harrelson is especially good as an asshole with a talent for zombie killing. Not to over-hype the movie but this is essential viewing if you have even a suspicion that zombies could be in your future.

Random thoughts at the end of the decade

It's too much pressure to try to sum up the past decade. At the top of my head, I would say that technology has been the most revolutionary thing about the 00's (I don't even begin to know how to say that); more specifically, the internet. It has changed the way people do business, interact with each other, and even think. For instance, I know that my attention span has been tragically shortened, thanks to the internet.

However, it was thanks to the efficiency of the internet that I was able to Google a random thought that lead to three years of college in the most impractical of studies, plan my wedding, and most recently. search for a house. The internet has made me the vague approximation of a normal adult that I am today.

I look forward to finding out how technology will exert its svengali-like influence over my life in the coming decade (oh please, let it be cyborgs). Happy new year!

Latest obsession: Eric Northman

Eric Northman is the title obsession but, truly, my feelings extend to the second season of "True Blood", which has a mere three episodes left to air.

The show has only improved since Season 1, with quicker pacing, more focused story lines, and further development of secondary characters like Tara (Rutina Wesley), Jessica (Deborah Ann Woll) and especially Alexander Skarsgard's character, Eric Northman. When Eric was introduced in the first season, he was clearly a significant character but Skargard's depiction lacked the intimidation that is to be expected of a 1000 year old vampire. However, the character improved considerably with the premiere of Season 2 in which Eric ripped a man in half then worried that the shower of blood had ruined the highlighting foils in his hair.

My only complaint about Season 2 is that the relationship between the main characters, Sookie (Anna Paquin) and Bill (Stephen Moyer), is starting to become a parody of itself with repeats of Sookie acting sassy and Bill attempting to save her. No wonder fans are frothing at the prospect of Sookie hooking up with Eric, which was made into virtual reality with a dream sequence in last Sunday's Episode 9.

At the 2009 Comic Con "True Blood" panel discussion, Skarsgard was clearly the most popular panelist. If you're going to scream for a hot vampire, let it be for a morally ambivalent 6'4'' man and not some petulant, perpetual teenager with sparkly skin.

Better from a distance

Second day of Comic Con and, already, exclusives are being released to the wider world, courtesy of the perpetually wired fanboys and fangirls in attendance.

Making use of Comic Con 2009 as a launching pad is the new Joss Whedon production, The Cabin in the Woods. The posters (see second variant and third variant) make me verrrry interested.

However, the biggest buzz is being generated by not one, but two separate clips of ripped boys without their shirts on from New Moon (find them yourself). The female hormones must have run so thick in that screening room that menstrual cycles will align.

As exciting as the cornucopia has been, I can confirm that viewing the images and videos on my computer, over 4000 km away from San Diego, is a sufficient splash guard from the aggressive fans that ruined my fun in 2008.

Mid-season TV news bits

• Nathan Fillion is back on TV in ABC's "Castle" starting March 9, 2009. It is purportedly a "witty drama" and Fillion's character is "out of control" so let's hope this is more fun than Fillion's previous vehicle, "Drive" and lasts longer than "Firefly" (sob).
• Harrold Perrineau is listed as a cast member in a new cop show, "The Unusuals". This can only mean, at the very least, less of Perrineau's character, Michael Dawson on "Lost". Personally, I want to see a violent end for Michael followed by cast-wide amnesia regarding his existence hereafter.
• Joss Whedon's latest foray into television, "Dollhouse" will premiere on Fox on February 13, 2009. Whedon fans, being the pessimistic sort prone to rallying around a cause, prematurely campaigned to save the show back in May. One has to wonder what kind of sadistic delight TV executives take in causing Whedon fans to jump at the shadow of cancellation while continuing to inflict "Heroes" on us long after any fan has ceased to care for it.
• Warning - "Battlestar Galactica" January 16 episode spoiler: Really, did anyone shed a tear at the death of Lt. Dualla? How else is Lee going to live happily ever after with Kara? Then again, I applauded when Cally Tyrol flew out into space. I'm a terrible person - long live the Cylons!

Stop the mediocrity

Like diarrhea, crap seems to come in waves.

Having seen last night's season premiere of "Heroes", I have officially given up on the series. I am fed up of shouting questions at my television in exasperation. Questions like:

Did Mohinder get his doctoral degree through a correspondence university? What kind of shoddy scientist ignores experimental methodology then is surprised at the negative side effects of injecting oneself with a serum that is completely unpredictable?

Is Mohinder now the Fly or Spider-Man? Will David Cronenberg sue before Marvel does?

Is Maya's short term memory related to her mutation? She has seemingly forgotten the death of her twin brother and hours after running in fear from Mohinder's mad scientist ambitions, she has shirt-ripping sex with him on the lab bench.

Why did Claire choose to stop Sylar as he was leaving only to ask why he did not kill her? In the context of revealing the shocking fact that Claire may be incapable of dying, it makes sense. In the context of giving helpful suggestions to a murderous psycho, not so much.

While I agree that Peter's powers are hindered by a shocking lack of ingenuity, even Peter could imagine using Hiro's powers to slow down time in order to evade Claire's bullet. Yet, this never occurs to Claire. And it must not have occurred to Peter until the last micro-second because he was pleading for his life while staring down the barrel of the gun. Working in the writers' favour: this proves that the characters share genes.

What part of the bible says that angels need to work in secret? Tell me, Nathan Petrelli!

The questions never cease when I watch "Heroes", but I must turn my attention to other news in fandom mediocrity.

In the vaccumn left by the termination of the Harry Potter series, parents will let their kids read anything and kids will look for any excuse to work themselves up into a frenzy at their local Chapters.

The kids apparently really like home schooled wonder, Christopher Paolini's latest derivative fantasy novel and Stephenie Meyer's Breaking Dawn. I'm going to assume that Paolini's book is as crappy as Eragon the movie. For Breaking Dawn, I'll take the word of Marlene Arpe, who I have trusted since her days as a columnist at Eye Weekly. Parents, having your daughters learn that they can find self-esteem through losing their virginity is not the message you want to encourage, no matter how literate they become in the process. I admit that judging material based on second hand testimony is weak but I am also receptive to defensive outrage written in my blog's comments section.

Another comic book for the masses

Apparently, a trilogy of movies based on the adventures of Tintin is planned, and Steven Spielberg and Peter Jackson are expected to direct a movie each. This is much more promising than that unfortunate union of Avatar and M. Night Shyamalan that was reported by self-described Avatard and eternal optimist, Vicki.

Tintin was the comic book that I grew up with. Whereas my parents discouraged reading Archie Comics, typical girl comic content at the time, claiming that the small print was bad for my eyes, they happily built my complete library of Tintin comic books.

Even as a fan, I shudder to think what a live version of Tintin might look like but I trust that Spielberg and Jackson, who will also serve as producer, are wealthier and more celebrated than me for a reason.

San Diego 2008 recap

Now that the Olympics are over, it is back to the regularly scheduled program of my never ending story about San Diego.

After the frustration of Comic Con 2008, we were eager to explore other attractions in San Diego, especially since Flocons and Royal had never been there.

La Jolla

Described in travel guides as a beautiful, retirement mecca, La Jolla was deemed car rental worthy by all. We arrived at 9am and already found it difficult but not impossible to park the car. Impossible came later, at noon, when one driver was willing to wait patiently for half an hour to take over our space.

The majority of La Jolla beaches consisted of narrow strips of sand with an overhang of cliffs. The crashing waves were impressive but hardly conducive to swimming. We settled on La Jolla Cove (seen above), which was very popular with snorklers. Even with our two swim goggles, shared between five people, and spit on by Alex, we could easily see the vivid Orange Garibaldi fish, the size of one's hand, as well as some smaller, unknown silver fish.

Mission Beach

In spite of its beauty, Joe and I did not like La Jolla as much as Mission Beach. With some coaxing, we convinced our friends to visit Mission Beach after a stopover at Roadrunner Sports and In-N-Out Burger, and they were not disappointed. On a side note, the Roadrunner Sports located in San Diego was purportedly the biggest running shoe store in North America but was seriously understaffed and understocked. Alex and Flocons ordered the 4X4 Burger from the secret menu at In-N-Out Burger and claimed to feel okay afterwards, blaming only the cheese for the time they served in the washroom later.

Mission Beach is a more traditional beach than La Jolla Cove, to be sure, but even with the high pedestrian traffic, the sand was clean and there was no sense of exclusivity. While strolling on the boardwalk, we took note of the websites for the rental units facing the beach and seriously dreamed of preparing food while watching a flat screen TV, like that guy with the open glass wall that we stared at from the boardwalk.

Many locals choose to take the public bus to Mission Beach in spite of the fact that parking is readily available. Later in our trip, we returned to Mission Beach by public bus (a mere 17 minute ride) to take surfing lessons. Our Surfari instructor knew he had his job cut out when he realized that none of us skateboarded nor snowboarded nor swam very well. He patiently guided us individually while the rest struggled to walk their boards into the waves, buffeted back one step for every two we advanced. I managed to 'pop up' with the instructor's assistance and I can now confidently say that I could not surf if my life depended on it.

Balboa Park

Joe and I had chosen to skip the San Diego Air & Space Museum during our last visit but it became our first destination this time around thanks to Star Trek: The Exhibition. Clearly a trap aimed at Comic Con attendees, we ran in gleefully when it opened at 10:00am. This exhibition was superior to one we had experienced in Las Vegas thanks to the many set recreations including the bridge of the original Enterprise, Picard's quarters, the hallway of the Enterprise D and the Transporter Room. We yucked it up while Royal covered her face in shame when she wasn't being forcibly posed in photographs that we later paid $15 each for.

The only other stop on our Balboa Park excursion was the San Diego Zoo. Flocons and Royal have a 'taste' for panda and, therefore, made a point of lining up to see them. Joe and I reluctantly joined them and were rewarded with a better view of the pandas than our last visit (see below).

All in all, a very enjoyable visit to San Diego, Comic Con 2008 notwithstanding. A bonus for vegetarians: San Diego restaurants offer a wide range of veggie burgers that are tasty. Minus for food connoisseurs: there are few true 'ethnic' food options.

Next up: my never ending story of our trip to San Francisco!

tokidoki's new bling

Two years ago, after attending the 2006 Comic Con, I bought a tokidoki bag from the Duty Free Shop steps from Grauman's Chinese Theatre in L.A. I was hesitant to buy the bag because $100 seemed quite steep for rip-stop nylon, even if it was cute. Luckily for me, Joe insisted on buying the Playground Ciao bag (seen on the left) for me and I have enjoyed it ever since.

In the two years since, tokidoki has become a phenomenon. Prices rose in the season immediately after my purchase, but the brand continued to grow in popularity. So, when I heard that tokidoki would no longer be produced by lesportsac after Winter 2007, I was surprised that such a profitable brand would be discontinued. (See the complete lesportsac line of tokidoki bags minus Winter 2007 here.)

Thinking that tokidoki bags were a thing of the past, I was pleasantly surprised when I saw the tokidoki booth at Comic Con 2008. Girls swarmed the counter and bought skateboard decks, t-shirts, accessories and whatever they could get their hands on. I found myself jumping into the fray but ultimately, walked away with nothing.

A few days after Comic Con had ended, I was at the Macy's in Union Square, San Francisco, when I came across new tokidoki bags that had just arrived, so the salesperson claimed. I looked over these new tokidoki bags and found them lacking, especially in comparison to my own tokidoki bag, which I was carrying. The teeth of the zippers were similarly multicoloured but much harsher in tone. All the hardware had a flashy gold tone unlike the more subtle brushed gold of my bag. A closer look at the finishing of the bags also showed a careless hand.

When I returned home, I checked the Wikipedia entry for tokidoki and was surprised to learn that lesportsac is reportedly the manufacturer of the new tokidoki line of bags. Apparently, the brand's illustrator and co-creator, Simone Legno, was given complete creative control and chose to leave out the lesportsac logo for a "cleaner aesthetic". These new bags are also expected to cost more than the previous line.

Either Wikipedia is mistaken in its claim that lesportsac has anything to do with the new line of tokidoki bags or lesportsac is screwing over Simone Legno by producing a sub par product.

It is understandable that Simone Legno and his business partners might want a bigger cut of the tokidoki pie, and separating themselves from lesportsac is a first step. However, will tokidoki fans buy any product with the tokidoki characters emblazoned on them, even if it is poorly made? Only numbers will tell.

Comic Con 2008 recap

As hinted at in my previous blog entry, I did not enjoy this year's Comic Con as much as the 2006 edition. In short, the desirable panels were inundated by attendees due to a lack of overall quality, a theory that Alex supports. I also suspect that there were more attendees in 2008 than in 2006 since the exhibition hall was hard to walk comfortably through from Wednesday to Saturday with the exception of Sunday.

In two incidences, I can blame the exhibitors directly for creating a bad situation. The Warner Bros. booth handed out free bags and instigated a stampede. Rather than relieve what was becoming a safety hazard, the Warner Bros. vendors created a bottle neck by insisting that attendees pick up the bags at a narrow stretch of counter space. It is understandable that Warner Bros. did not want flailing arms to knock over displays on the counter but they should have foreseen the freebie frenzy and been better prepared. People who had obtained a free bag had to fight their way out of the surging crowd, rugby style.

A second horrible freebie experience was with Imagi Studios and Summit Entertainment, who were promoting the new AstroBoy movie by handing out a free AstroBoy bag. Rather than simply giving out the bags like every other vendor, Imagi Studios and Summit Entertainment forced everyone to wait in a line and chant "AstroBoy" at regular intervals. We had waited for 30 minutes when I asked the lead cheerleader what we were waiting for. The lead cheerleader first chose to mock me with, "You don't even know what you're lining up for?" Then, when I had clarified my question, she chose to ignore it and instead, handed me the AstroBoy bag she had been waving provocatively at the lineup, and asked, "Are you happy now?" By her defensive stance and lack of explanation, I can only assume that we were being forced to sing and dance for our payoff, much like minstrels. We left soon after and I gave my AstroBoy bag away because it was ill-begotten loot.

The few panels that we were able to get into, because I was not willing to line up for hours beforehand, were entertaining enough. "The Comedy Central TV Funhouse" panel with Robert Smigel, Dino Stamatopoulos and Tommy Blacha was pretty funny though they all came across as competitive geeks. When Doug Dale showed up via webcam, it got even better as Dale used a variety of props to protest being ignored (i.e. miming a genial conversation with a Lambchop puppet or chewing on an egg that suddenly produces a new friend). It made me sad though that Dale could not make it in person to Comic Con because he was now a music teacher and therefore, had unglamorous responsibilities.

Immediately after the TV Funhouse panel was the "10th Annual Superhero Kung-Fu Extravaganza" hosted by Martial Arts movie academic, Ric Meyers. This panel produced an unexpected gem in Mark Zaror (seen on the left), the South American martial arts star of Chinango, a movie that featured two gratuitous masturbation scenes and whose rental my friends have never forgiven me for. I was clearly one of few people in the audience who knew who he was so I am regretful that I did not ask him about Chinango even though he was promoting Kiltro.

Also entertaining for all the wrong reasons was the live broadcast of the Masquerade on Saturday evening. This was the live remote screening of the Masquerade for people who were either not able or not willing to obtain tickets for the actual event venue. Because none of the masquerade participants could hear us, the remote screening audience resorted to heckling early on. Three themes emerged from the masquerade entries:

1. Skin show - Young flesh seemed to make up for many an uninspired costume. This became entertaining when one Emma Frost wannabee ended up revealing the stuffing in her chest while one mannish jungle queen's outfit prompted one of the emcees to quip, "I love the Masquerade!"

2. All's well that ends with a dance - No matter how stiffly you may dance as a result of your costume or your natural lack of rhythm, you will end your stint on the stage with pelvic gyrations to "I'm Too Sexy" or another equally overused joke song.

3. The never ending story - One of the worst entries was a group of vikings whose costumes were lackluster but whose showmanship was on par with a kindergarten recital. For over five minutes, the vikings danced poorly to an inexplicable selection of contemporary songs. This marathon of mediocrity was matched only by the half-time show, "Heroes vs. Villains: A Battle Royale," which was supposed to be a martial arts demonstration. It ended up being a soap opera with an indecipherable storyline and dialogue, and very little action. This was the point at which Joe and I, as well as the majority of the remaining audience, decided to call it a day.

All was not lost at Comic Con 2008. The costumes outside of the Masquerade, a small selection seen below, were actually pretty impressive. One Batman, whose outfit I sadly did not photograph, was fully committed to his role. At the panels that he attended, he would alternately growl, "Swear to me!" or "Be quiet!" at other attendees. He also stood up and spread his cape whenever he was referred to by the panelists. This approach to cosplay is definitely preferable to the serious and self-conscious display some attendees offered.

My trip to San Diego ended up being made worthwhile by activities outside of Comic Con 2008. More on San Diego and my trip to San Francisco coming up!

Possibly never again

I hate to be one of those many idiots at Comic Con who blog about Comic Con as it is happening, but in my defence, it is 7am local time and I have access to free internet at my hotel.

I have not enjoyed Comic Con 2008 and this can be blamed entirely on the organizers who over sold their membership badges. The simple act of walking within a block of the San Diego Convention Center, much less inside the actual building, has been an exercise in road rage. It feels much like being in the hottest club in town on a Saturday night except the clubbers are wider or carrying huge bags or pushing strollers.

If this was my first experience of Comic Con, I might well accept this experience as par for course. The problem is that I have my amazing 2006 experience to refer to. In 2006, the event was busy but not crazy. I was able to easily get into highly coveted events like a discussion by Stan Lee and John Romita Sr., and the "Battlestar Galatica" panel. Alex even ran into Joss Whedon. This year, extreme lineups prevented me from getting anywhere near Joss Whedon's event, and I was also barred from seeing Simon Pegg and Edgar Wright for the same reason. On the plus side, I saw the actor who starred in South American martial arts film, Chinango.

Nerds are waiting behind me, eager to also type about their experiences so I will end this blog entry here. I can only hope that organizers will wade through the many gushing blog entries and heed the warning that is featured in this one: lower your attendance numbers or expect them to be lowered for you.

Watch the Watchmen!

Check out the Watchmen movie website to see the trailer. It is as stunning and faithful to the original artwork as one would expect from Zack Sndyer, the director of 300, with Smashing Pumpkins' “The Beginning Is the End Is the Beginning” serving as the perfect musical accompaniment. I am also pleased to see that the cast consists of lesser known character actors, as opposed to stars who are incapable of disappearing within a role.

Let's hope the movie - screenplay, dialogue, pacing, editing - is just as good.

Excitement unlimited coming soon

Tomorrow is my last day of work before I take off for a week of fandom madness!

Joe and I have purchased advance tickets to see The Dark Knight. We were tempted by the 3:00am (!) screening on Friday morning but decided to go for the much more sensible 10:30pm showing on Sunday night. We hope that this choice weeds out children and anyone with a job.

Then, later this week, we return to Comic Con in San Diego. After our great experience in 2006, we whimpered like puppies last summer because we were not at Comic Con, so we are happy to finally give in to our urges. This time, we are wiser:

• stay in a hotel that is walking distance from the San Diego Convention Centre
• plan ahead by looking over the events schedule and merchandise lists
• bring snacks so that we do not have to endure 12 hours of starvation like Alex did in protest over convention food prices
• bring a sweater because the convention centre is kept like a meat locker
• do not go to Tijuana

Flocon and his partner, Royal Pinguo, decided to join us after we enticed them with our magical stories...and because they have friends to visit in Orange County. Surprisingly, it was Royal who suggested that we dress up for Comic Con.

Flocons proposed Dogwelder (seen as a puppet on the right), a hero so obscure that only true fan boys will be able to smugly appreciate the costume. Other ideas included Jedi knights, Star Trek officers, and nudity but nothing has come to fruition.

Now, with less than a week to go, I am scrambling to find something. After rummaging through my closet, I see only three options:

Burger King - My Burger King mask, which I got for free with coupon, is truly great. Creepy and made of sturdy plastic, it served me well on Halloween at the office. It sits patiently in my cupboard at work, waiting to be called into action again.

Anne of Green Gables - The Anne of Green Gables hat and wig combo, modeled by my friend Stephen on the right, was brought all the way back from Prince Edward Island for me by Flocons and Royal. The Japanese know comics, having a whole genre (manga) to call their own. They also love Anne of Green Gables and made an anime version of the classic novel. Plus, 2008 is the centenary of the publishing of Anne of Green Gables. This is making more and more sense as I type!

Platinum blond wig - There is no easy explanation for the photograph on the left but a platinum blond wig offers many possibilities: Emma Frost, Betty Cooper, or Jedi Knight? Why not all at the same time?

Delightful anecdotes are guaranteed in the next blog entry, even if I have to lie.

P.S. To would be thieves, I have a house sitter who collects knives, enjoys sitting in the dark, and has a nervous twitch. Think about it.

The Jamie Kennedy experience

I went to Jamie Kennedy at the Gardiner (JK@G) for lunch today. I had dreamed of eating there ever since my visit to the Gardiner Museum. So, when my boss, Bob proposed taking me and my co-worker, AL, out to lunch at the Gardiner, it was a dream come true!

Being predominantly in the lunch business, with only dinner served on Friday nights, the dining room was comfortably filled to capacity during our visit. The interior of JK@G is minimalist in aesthetic with the emphasis placed on the views outside, unobstructed by the floor to ceiling windows.

Bob, AL and I had been salivating over the online menu but found it changed on the day of our meal. The Duck Confit ($20) that I had decided to have, after debating with AL whether it was rude to order the most expensive dish on the menu, was not offered. Instead, I ordered the Black Cod with Spring Vegetable Ragout ($18), which Bob also decided to have. AL chose the Sea Scallops with Pork Belly ($18). Bob also ordered an appetizer to share: Cherry Wood Smoked Salmon with Fried Olives and Organic Egg ($14).

The server brought us fresh sourdough to whet our appetites along with butter, pepper puree and another orange puree that was equally delicious. When the Smoked Salmon appetizer arrived, we peered at the two tiny pieces until Bob judiciously created three equal portions. The salmon was unlike any that I have had before - perhaps it was the cherry wood influence. The fried olives were too small to savour for long. The organic eggs tasted like normal eggs.

I was disappointed with my black cod dish. Having cooked black cod many times back when it was plentiful in supply, I know how easily it can be made delicious due to its naturally sweet flavour. My black cod at JK@G was completely flavourless, in spite of having its skin fried to a crispy finish. The ragout was also underwhelming with a flavour that I promptly forgot. AL found her pork belly too salty and was surprised with the puniness of her scallops.

Fortunately, JK@G did dessert right. I got the Flourless Chocolate Cake ($7), as did Bob the biter. AL got the Banana and Dulce de Leche Cake ($7). Both desserts were accompanied by nutty flavoured sorbets and various berries that truly complemented the pastry. The banana cake looked more like a homemade muffin but turned out to be a moderate yet complex experience. The chocolate cake was dense without being heavy.

Bob, AL and I wandered onto the balcony afterwards to admire the ROM and the neighbouring buildings before wandering down the attractive stairwell and out the front door.

As we walked back to work, we entered a cinematic dimension. A guy on a bike was whizzing by when he stopped suddenly to ask if Bob was, in fact, sci-fi author, William Gibson. As he spoke, I suddenly realized that the guy on the bike was a former high school classmate who I had not seen in nearly a decade. I called to him in vain as he remained starstruck in the presence of Bob. It was like a French farce with a case of mistaken identity and genuine confusion. Bob finally confirmed that he was not William Gibson ("I can't believe he called my research science fiction," Bob later quipped), and I directed my sheepish former classmate to message me on Facebook. Everything had returned to normal and we strolled merrily back to our office.

Neo...uh, Luke...I mean, Wesley, you're special!

Let me admit that I'm probably going to see Wanted. But aren't fanboys tired of being fed the same crap over and over again?

Ordinary guy (1) who leads a boring existence (2) is recruited by a mysterious female (3) to help rid the world of evil using innate powers (4) that he never knew he possessed. He undergoes a rigorous training program under the tutelage of a fellow of colour (5), joins an elite crew (6), and discovers a world of danger and intrigue in the process.

(1) Wesley Gibson or Thomas Anderson or Luke Skywalker

(2) in a cubicle or on a farm

(3) Fox or Trinity or Princess Leia

(4) genetic makeup of an assassin or possibility of being The One or The Force

(5) Sloan or Morpheus or Yoda

(6) Fraternity of Assassins or the crew of the Nebuchadnezzar or the Rebel Alliance

Wanted has the added bonus of the main character disdainfully crapping on the targeted audience: "Six weeks ago, I was ordinary and pathetic...just like you." Audience members wearing trenchcoats and witty t-shirts shed a single tear.

Comic Con - here I come!

Two years ago, I went to Comic Con and loved it. In fact, last year, my friends and I went into withdrawal during the month of July because we were not in San Diego.

It is funny that one of the most effective ways to bring back all my Comic Con memories is to listen to Cassie's "Me & U", which was played on the radio every half hour. I wish I was exaggerating.

So, we've decided to go back to Comic Con in 2008. I am happy to take on some challenges again from anyone who cares to see me suffer in California. In the meantime, here's some Cassie.

Watch me sleep

It is only my third week of work and already, I'm getting lackadaisical. Instead of getting a full night's sleep during the past week so that I look peppy and smart, I have been staying up late, reading the classic graphic novel, The Watchmen. My friend, Stephen lent it to me last Sunday and, reading it every night, I finally finished it on Thursday. Part of the reason it took so long was because I refused to forgo my steady diet of terrible prime time television. As a result, I read late at night until dialogue ceased making sense.

The other reason why it took so long to finish The Watchmen is because it's thick like gravy. When creator, Alan Moore claimed that he was aiming for "a superhero Moby Dick; something that had that sort of weight, that sort of density," he wasn't kidding. The complex storyline and characters forced my reading to a snail's pace in order to absorb every nasty, ruthless detail.

I was also impressed that a 20 year old comic book has aged so well. There is an absence of embarrassing 80s fashions and cringe-inducing slang. I did initially complain about the drawing style, which is less easy on the eyes than those of contemporary comic books, but it fits the nature of the story.

The short of it is that I really enjoyed The Watchmen and highly recommend it. Now, a full weekend to recover on sleep and enjoy some free and live violence: UFC 70 Nations Collide.

Eye Get Out:
On the right is evidence that I have a secret need to play slots. I was amazed that three models of Volkswagens pulled up at the lights in a neat lineup: a Golf, a Jetta and a Beetle. What are the odds? I took a photo and the woman standing beside me at the TTC stop looked perplexed and a little concerned.

Waiting with trepidation

A few months ago, the trailer for 300 was released and I was stunned. I had heard that a movie adaptation of Frank Miller's graphic novel would be made but I did not expect it to look like the most fantastic nightmare.

I realize that I should try to calm down since I ruined Borat for myself by overhyping it over several months. But, in this case, I can easily come up with reasons why I might not enjoy 300.

• I was not a fan of Sin City. It looked great but Frank Miller's clichéd dialogue and cast of caricatures were too exasperating. I do not expect much progress in 300, since the source material was written before Sin City.
• The story of the 300 Spartans battling the Persian army sounds like the kind of heroic underdog story that contemporary audiences love. However, upon closer inspection, the Spartans come across like a bunch of Aryan jocks. Here was a society that shunned the handicapped and the weak. It was their ruthless practice of weeding out so-called inferiors, like leaving babies in the wilderness to see which ones would survive, that eventually contributed to the decline of the population, and hence, their society.
• Pitted against the racial homogeneity of the Spartans are a bunch of coloured people and the physically deformed. When Frank Miller transforms the Greek turncoat, Ephialtes, into a grotesque hunchback, he participates in the kind of vilification that is usually only found in childish fairy tales. As an adult, equating minorities and the ugly with evil is harder to swallow.

Having said all this, I will probably see 300 in March, unless it gets a 'Rotten' rating on Rotten Tomatoes.

PS, fanboys/girls, I am prepared to be told how wrong I am. I have not read Frank Miller's graphic novel so feel free to school me.

Stay away in droves

Dear Geeks and Fanboys & Fangirls,

I'm begging you, please do not go support Eragon in the movie theatres. It looked like a piece of crap when it was featured at Comic Con this past summer and its 11% rating on Rotten Tomatoes only confirms this.

First, why do you insist of reading the same material over and over again? I have never read the book by Christopher Paolini that the movie is based on but from the synopsis alone, I would say that the story has been done: ordinary peasant boy turns out to be destined for greatness and to become the saviour of his people against an evil leader. Didn't you already see Star Wars? Haven't you read David Eddings's Belgariad series? Perhaps you've heard of a small movie called Lord of the Rings? How about the New Testament of the Bible?

And speaking of LOTR, doesn't 'Eragon' sound suspiciously similar to 'Aragon'? Was Paolini incapable of coming up with a more original name for his protagonist? An online fantasy name generator could have helped mask the creative void.

Even if you do find comfort in the familiar, you must have some sort of pride left; 20th Century Fox is insulting your intelligence. The studio thinks that if it enlists the two biggest FX studios, Industrial Light & Magic and Weta, to essentially recreate LOTR, you will lap it up. The Eragon trailer could have simply cut and pasted battle and evil horde scenes from the LOTR and there would have been no discernable difference.

Please prove to the studios that fantasy enthusiasts are not undiscriminating drones who will pay to see anything with magic and dragons.

On Monday, when box office numbers come out, I will find out if I should be gnashing my teeth and tearing out my hair.