Friday, March 10, 2006

Dorian Grey doesn't live here

It was recently announced that former Ontario Premier, David Peterson, has gotten the juicy ceremonial position of University of Toronto Chancellor. As I stared at an understandably joyous Peterson, the only thing I could think was, "My god, he's gotten old."

I still remember Peterson's boyish good looks in the early '90s, which doesn't seem so long ago. While encounters with towering adult versions of children you once patted on the head makes one feel old, being confronted with rapidly decaying versions of formerly virile adults is frighteningly intriguing. Other intriguing specimens include:

  • Greta Scacchi - she was once offered Sharon Stone's role in Basic Instinct. Now, she fits in perfectly with the cast of British geriatric murder mystery, "Miss Marple".
  • Cindy Crawford
  • "Posh Spice" Victoria Beckham - in this case, gaining weight might just solve the chihuahua look
  • Britney Spears - taking care of two children (the baby and the hubby) will do that to you
  • Uma Thurman
  • Diana Rigg
  • Jello Biafra - if you're a punk rocker who has survived premature death, in all its glory, this is what happens

Then, there are those who obviously have a pact with the devil:

  • Sharon Stone - how is it possible that she looks exactly the same from Basic Instinct to Basic Instinct 2 despite a span of 14 years
  • Mary Steenburgen - Steenburgen is a perfect example of a woman who was considered homely in her younger years (Parenthood) then became hotter and hotter simply because she stayed the same.
  • Bob Rae - maybe he lowered everyone's expectations from the beginning with the prematurely grey hair
  • Cher - it's all plastic and she apparently works out four hours a day, but she looks younger than ever before
  • Halle Berry
  • Oprah Winfrey
  • Jackie Chan - the hair shields the face, even when everything else breaks

Please feel free to list other celebrities in Comments under either "Touched by Dorian Grey" or "Old".

3 comments:

dissimulate me said...

you have oprah on there.. but have you ever seen her with out the lights and makeup??? her face is very haggered looking and she looks alot older then her 50 years.. this pic is not the worst i've seen her but its an example.
http://www.battlehype.com/content/no_makeup/oprah.jpg

dissimulate me said...

here is another link with pictures of celebrities with no makeup or good lighting.. some of the ones on your lists are on there too..

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/celeb.html

Flocons said...

I have this friend named Fiona that has not aged since I've known her. She may be in league with Satan!