No whine, please

I've decided on a new personal resolution that will probably be harder than my brief foray into full-time vegetarianism: I'm going to try to give up whining.

whine
noun –verb (used without object)
1. to utter a low, usually nasal, complaining cry or sound, as from uneasiness, discontent, peevishness, etc.: The puppies were whining from hunger.
2. to snivel or complain in a peevish, self-pitying way: He is always whining about his problems. –verb (used with object)
3. to utter with or as if with a whine: I whined my litany of complaints. –noun
4. a whining utterance, sound, or tone.
5. a feeble, peevish complaint.

This is going to be hard because I live in a city of whiners; people who bitch about the weather, their jobs, or just about anything that tickles their fancy. Wait! Is that statement a whine?

For the next week, I will aim for 'stoic' rather than 'bottle of sunshine'. I am also giving the people around me permission to slap me if they hear a nasally sound escape from my mouth. And I will probably thank them for the effort, though not if it is excessively hard. Hopefully, friends on whine patrol will also refrain from whining around me because peer pressure and enabling make recovery much harder.

Until next Friday, no whine with my cheese.

My latest obsession: Kings of Leon

I haven't heard such a great song of longing since U2's "All I Want Is You". Sacrilege, you say! Listen to "Use Somebody" by Kings of Leon and comment at will.

PS: Kings of Leon were the opening band for U2 during their 2005 US tour. So, maybe this isn't so far fetched at all.

Nuit Blanche 2008 recap

I had high hopes for Nuit Blanche 2008 when I read that organizers were going to tackle two of my biggest complaints: over-crowded venues and under-servicing by the TTC. The TTC service was slightly better though I ended up outpacing one Queen St. streetcar after being prevented from boarding due to its full load. However, the lessons learned from the two previous years made for an event that held its visitors out of arm's reach though, at times, for good reason.

The biggest disappointment about the 2008 edition of Nuit Blanche was the lack of interaction with the public. In their bid to accommodate as many visitors as possible, many art pieces were featured in large scale venues and barred viewers from participation. I Promise It Will Always Be This Way by Jon Sasaki featured costumed team mascots performing to crowd pumping music in Lamport Stadium. The audience was not allowed on the field but relegated to cheering from the stands. In spite of the fact that the mascots frequently ran by, giving high fives to audience members and tossing balls into the crowd, the overall effect was strained because of the barrier.

In contrast, the piece that Lamport Stadium housed last year, Locust by Noboru Tsubaki featured a giant inflated locust who sat silently as visitors jumped and crawled all over it when the lone security guard was not within shouting distance. The ability to interact with the giant locust caused an awe and giddiness in the visitors that all the loud music and fist pumping of Saski's work could not muster. Unfortunately, Tsubaki's locust did suffer from the love bumps of visitors and had become severely deflated by 2am, according to one first hand account. Hence, the barrier is understandable though regrettable.

The distance between art and audience was maintained throughout the 2008 exhibits. Overflow by Michel de Broin featured a waterfall flowing from a third floor building window onto the ground below. Even though a public park surrounded the building, a chain link fence relegated visitors to peering like unwanted protesters from the sidewalk. Security is an understandable concern, but it is doubtful that the artist intended for the fence to become such a distraction from his work.

Even in the absence of an actual barrier, I often found myself standing at a respectable distance from the work, within a crowd. I felt like I was at a busker's festival as I watched Toronto City Hall light up like a pixel board (Stereoscope by Project Blinkenlights), a giant, inflated cone spin (Into The Blue by Fujiwara Takahiro, seen on the left), people smashed stuff (SMASH! Droppin' Stuff by The Custodians of Destruction), and beat drums (Sound Forest by Tova Kardonne and Christine Duncan). Sound Forest was especially disappointing as I had expected a more free flowing experience with the promise of "trees full of voices" and encouragements to "wander through, listen to the ten ambulatory choirs". Instead, a ring of spectators boxed in the performers and prevented newcomers from seeing anything.

One could claim that this is the price Nuit Blanche pays for its growing popularity. To accommodate the crowds, a distance must be maintained. Yet, art pieces from previous years welcomed visitors en masse while removing physical and mental barriers. 2006's Fog in Toronto #71624 by Fujiko Nakaya covered Philosopher's Walk in an artificial mist. Large crowds wandered throughout the surreal environment without major issue. Similarly, large crowds of visitors explored Lower Bay TTC Station for 2007's The Ghost Station by Kristen Roos, and were engulfed in the sound installation.

The only 2008 piece that integrated its audience into the art was Horroridor by Kelly Mark. In the York Street Concourse under Union Station, visitors walked between 20 foot screens featuring non-stop clips from horror movies accompanied by a barrage of screaming on all sides. Mark's piece was not met with the laughter that one might expect from a late night crowd in an uncomfortable situation.

The tomfoolery of rowdy idiots coming from the bars and clubs to Nuit Blanche after 2am has been under reported in the media. Apparently, a leg was broken during 2006's Ballroom Dancing by Darren O'Donnell after drunken participants joined in on the large scale game of dodge ball. O'Donnell slyly made reference to the need for security with his 2007 entry, Dancing with Teacher, where a security guard presided over the velvet rope that separated actual teachers from prospective dance partners in the audience.

In the bid to make Nuit Blanche accessible to a wider audience, the organizers have sacrificed intimacy in favour of security, and catered to the lowest common denominator. Much of the work featured in 2008 lacked the depth of previous work, focusing instead on superficial entertainment. Throughout the night, loud and obnoxious parties infringed on the enjoyment of works that lacked any audio component to drown out their comments.

Perhaps it is too much to ask for more work like last year's ThunderEgg Alley: A Dumpster Diver's Paradise by Swintak. Swintak's conversion of an industrial dumpster into a luxury hotel room was intimate, thoughtful yet amusing, and we were lucky to arrive when it was highly accessible. However, the corporate sponsor probably was not thrilled by the obscure location that Swintak's work resided in since it does not allow for maximum exposure of the brand to the public.

Only 2009 will tell if Nuit Blanche organizers choose to continue catering to a wider, fickle audience who want easy access to cheap thrills or if the event will be returned to the city's art enthusiasts. On the plus side, the large volume of participants in Nuit Blanche proves that Stephen Harper's claim that art events do not resonate with "ordinary people" is moot.

Nuit Blanche this Saturday!

I failed to recount my experience of Nuit Blanche 2007 in this blog because I was busy Facebooking at the time (photos of 2007 with captions way below). The short story is that I loved it and stayed out as late as I could (midnight) before retiring because I was slated to run the Waterfront Half-Marathon the next morning. My race performance suffered due to a forced pit stop brought about by the free egg salad sandwiches I had eaten the night before. And yet, it was worth it!

This year, with the Waterfront Half-Marathon behind me, I can enjoy Nuit Blanche on October 4 until Joe forces me to go home (probably, midnight).

Some highlights of the 2008 program (artist statements taken from the website) that I intend to see are:

Waterfall, 2008
Katharine Harvey - Toronto, Canada
Installation at Ontario Power Generation Building, 700 University Avenue
Katharine Harvey will suspend a "quilt" of recyclable plastic from the north side of the Ontario Power Generation Building, suggesting a suspended waterfall. The quilt will be made from recyclable plastic bottles and shaped into sheets of “falling water” by containing them in monofilament nylon netting and sewing the netting together into a quilt. Spotlights will light the installation from below so that from a distance, the audience will anticipate water but will instead find plastic trash, which has been magically transformed by theatrical coloured lighting to create the impression of falling water.

Stereoscope, 2008
Project Blinkenlights, Tim Pritlove, Thomas Fiedler - Berlin, Germany

Performance Art, Multimedia Installation at Toronto City Hall, 100 Queen Street West
Stereoscope is an interactive light installation at Toronto City Hall. This installation by the German group Project Blinkenlights transforms the landmark towers into a huge display screen by arranging lamps behind each of the 960 windows of the building. From dusk till dawn, the façade will serve as an ever-changing and evolving kaleidoscope of graphic animations automatically generated and interactively orchestrated. The public can influence "Stereoscope" through a variety of interfaces including smartphones, the web and physical controllers located at Nathan Phillips Square. Everybody is invited to participate and get more information at http://www.blinkenlights.net/

Domaine de l'angle #2, 2008
BGL, Sébastien Giguère, Nicolas Laverdière, Jasmin Bilodeau - Quebec City, Canada
Installation at Masey Hall, 178 Victoria Street (Alley beside Massey Hall off of Shuter Street)
The Quebec City-based art collective BGL is known for installations that take over architecture and wryly comment on institutional space. BGL will construct a 40 metre long drop ceiling in the alley of St. Enoch's Square beside Massey Hall, framing the dumpsters, recycling bins and other life of the alleyway in the cool fluorescent light of the modern office.

Horroridor, 2008
Kelly Mark - Toronto, Canada
Video Installation at Union Station, 65 Front Street West (Lower West entrance)
Viewers will be guided toward a long corridor where they will pass through the approximately 20-foot dual projections of visual and audio recordings of hundreds of people screaming on either side of them. "Horroridor" is a multi-channel dvd installation utilizing found footage from horror-thriller movies. The installation examines Hollywood’s construction of the reaction to the unknown. "Horroridor" strips away narrative to a non-articulated response of rage, pain and frustration, by isolating media recordings of men and women screaming to unknown forces that threaten existence. Ultimately the primal scream is showcased.

I have selfishly chosen not to highlight the smaller exhibitions to prevent a stampede of attendees. However, every single detail of my night out on October 4, 2008 will be recounted in never ending blog entries to come.

In the meantime, here are some of my photographs from Nuit Blanche 2007.

Attendees piling into Lower Bay Station for The Ghost Station by Kristen Roos, a sound installation. The TTC employee scheduled to be in Lower Bay Station all night was not afraid of the wall shaking noise. "That's what the ear plugs are for," he told me.

Slow Dance With Teacher by Darren O'Donnell. My dancing partner was a real teacher who was slated to dance until midnight, at which point she was off to assist another Nuit Blanche artist until 5am. Then she was going to man a booth at Word on the Street on Sunday. Then she was going to enrich her students on Monday. I'm exhausted just thinking about it.

Event Horizon by Jennifer Marman and Daniel Borins. An alien crash landing in the middle of King's College Circle at the University of Toronto. "Move along! Nothing to see here!" the officer said.
Play by Hear by Science and Sons. By inserting the ear buds of MP3 players into the small hole, your bad taste in music is projected for all to hear. "Everyone will know my love of Nickleback," said Joe.

Art...hopefully. Calling the number resulted in nothing.

Better luck next time, fatty

The weather conditions were ideal last Sunday during the Toronto Waterfront Half-Marathon and I set a personal course record. Yet, it was not one of my better race experiences. From the 3 kilometer mark onwards, I fought the desire to throw myself under a passing emergency vehicle. After grinding through the remaining 18km, Kenneth Mungara of Kenya (seen above) stole my thunder by finishing his marathon at the same time as me. All cheers and cameras were directed at him, as I pouted nearby.

However, I know that Kenneth Mungara understands how I feel because his win was probably overshadowed by Ethiopian elite marathoner, Haile Gebreselassie's smashing of his own world record that same day. Gebreselassie won the Berlin Marathon in 2:03:59, shaving 27 seconds from the previous record. Mungara's 2:11:00 finish seems like a snail's pace in comparison.

I'll be running the Las Vegas Half-Marathon in December and I now have a goal: I will beat the marathon winner. Hopefully, Mungara will be in the race; I would love to return the favour by stealing that jerk's thunder.

I'm kidding!

Stop the mediocrity

Like diarrhea, crap seems to come in waves.

Having seen last night's season premiere of "Heroes", I have officially given up on the series. I am fed up of shouting questions at my television in exasperation. Questions like:

Did Mohinder get his doctoral degree through a correspondence university? What kind of shoddy scientist ignores experimental methodology then is surprised at the negative side effects of injecting oneself with a serum that is completely unpredictable?

Is Mohinder now the Fly or Spider-Man? Will David Cronenberg sue before Marvel does?

Is Maya's short term memory related to her mutation? She has seemingly forgotten the death of her twin brother and hours after running in fear from Mohinder's mad scientist ambitions, she has shirt-ripping sex with him on the lab bench.

Why did Claire choose to stop Sylar as he was leaving only to ask why he did not kill her? In the context of revealing the shocking fact that Claire may be incapable of dying, it makes sense. In the context of giving helpful suggestions to a murderous psycho, not so much.

While I agree that Peter's powers are hindered by a shocking lack of ingenuity, even Peter could imagine using Hiro's powers to slow down time in order to evade Claire's bullet. Yet, this never occurs to Claire. And it must not have occurred to Peter until the last micro-second because he was pleading for his life while staring down the barrel of the gun. Working in the writers' favour: this proves that the characters share genes.

What part of the bible says that angels need to work in secret? Tell me, Nathan Petrelli!

The questions never cease when I watch "Heroes", but I must turn my attention to other news in fandom mediocrity.

In the vaccumn left by the termination of the Harry Potter series, parents will let their kids read anything and kids will look for any excuse to work themselves up into a frenzy at their local Chapters.

The kids apparently really like home schooled wonder, Christopher Paolini's latest derivative fantasy novel and Stephenie Meyer's Breaking Dawn. I'm going to assume that Paolini's book is as crappy as Eragon the movie. For Breaking Dawn, I'll take the word of Marlene Arpe, who I have trusted since her days as a columnist at Eye Weekly. Parents, having your daughters learn that they can find self-esteem through losing their virginity is not the message you want to encourage, no matter how literate they become in the process. I admit that judging material based on second hand testimony is weak but I am also receptive to defensive outrage written in my blog's comments section.

My body betraying me

My vacations are usually the kind of experience that leaves me exhausted and worse for wear. I have eased back since my trip to London, where my non-stop walking left my back so sore that coughing hurt.

Regardless of my increased kindness to myself, ever since my return from San Diego and San Francisco (anecdotes to come), I have had a steady stream of health problems. I have forgone a visit the doctor in every instance, choosing instead to refer to the internet and resort to bed rest. Chris Rock's father would be proud, if I did not live in the land of universal health care, in which case he would probably call me an idiot.

Common cold - roughly 2 weeks of recovery
Immediately after returning home, I took on the cold from hell. A sore throat quickly became a runny nose, congestion, and extreme fatigue. I amazed myself by sleeping all day, waking up to eat, then returning to bed to pass out for the rest of the night. It looked bad when I called in sick the first day back from vacation, after a civic long weekend, but it couldn't be helped. I was a wreck.

Midsummer's Night Run 15K - one week of recovery
Admittedly, this was self-inflicted; I ran 15 km after four weeks spent running 5 km at most or not running at all due to the cold. Luckily, I suffered nothing more than the usual stiff gait, reminiscent of M. Piedlourde, which amused my co-workers.

Diarrhea - roughly one week of recovery
It was hard to figure out what triggered my problems since I ate many delicious, special occasion foods the Sunday before my bout of diarrhea. I took the Monday off and my co-workers, without a doubt, rolled their eyes. For the next five days, I had the ass that would not quit. After suffering for four days, I referred to the internet, which told me that I should have checked in with a doctor two days earlier. I was also amazed to learn that large amounts of fibre and milk made diarrhea worse. I did not go to a doctor and only ate cheese once before my intestinal tract fully recovered.

Angular Cheilitis - two weeks and counting
What started out as a crack in the corner of my mouth, which I callously picked at, proved to be something more than a one time anomaly when it appeared on the other side of my mouth. I only checked the internet after suffering for a week and found out that I should be moisturizing instead of drying out the problem. The cause is usually a vitamin deficiency but only a blood test can confirm which one. I have accepted that there are mysteries in life that may never be resolved and caked on petroleum jelly.

Undiagnosed back problem - two days and counting
I walked without issue to work yesterday but, by noon, I was hunched over like a crone, unable to stand upright. Sneezing and laughing hurt, which meant that, technically, my co-workers were laughing at me and not with me, as I shuffled around the office. With a week to go before the Toronto Waterfront Half-Marathon, I have finally decided to enlist the professional (and costly) help of a chiropractor, which I am scheduled to meet with tomorrow. In the meantime, I have taken another day off from work and thank the stars that I am unionized.