Hentai robots!

I must admit that I know very little about robots and, despite what you may have heard, I know almost nothing about hentai. But I aim to please, so here goes.

I started biking on a regular basis every summer about six years ago. Then two years ago, I switched to running. The reasons for my increasing fitness level include fear of increasing back fat as well as an ongoing vendetta with Flocons. However, one reason that I do not publicly give is that I am preparing for a disaster of some sort, including robot uprisings. I suppose I could take martial arts classes or firearms training but to be honest, I am more likely to run than fight. To my friends: rest assured that I will be running to find more competent help than I can offer, while you wrestle that toaster to the ground.

To make up for my lack, I would like to refer readers to real robot experts.

Daniel H. Wilson's book, How To Survive a Robot Uprising : Tips on Defending Yourself Against the Coming Rebellion should prove useful. Wilson is a PhD candidate in Robotics, which makes such statements as "any machine could rebel, from a toaster to a Terminator" or "most robots will sink in water or mud and fall through ice" words to live by.

Cheap fatalists take note: the book is now 24% off at Amazon.ca.

Scientists are not the only ones preoccupied with possible robot threats. The Flaming Lips have waxed poetic about this very topic in "Yoshimi battles the Pink Robots". Here are the lyrics:

Her name is Yoshimi - she's a black belt in karate

Working for the city - she has to discipline her body

Cause she knows that it's demanding to defeat these

Evil machines - I know she can beat them

Oh Yoshimi

They don't believe me

But you won't let those

Robots defeat me

Oh Yoshimi

They don't believe me

But you won't let those

Robots eat me

Those evil natured robots - they're programmed to

Destroy us

She's gotta be strong to fight them

So she's taking lots of vitamins - cause she knows that

It'd be tragic if those evil robots win - I know

She can beat them

This will be the soundtrack of our lives if the future ends up like The Terminator. Thankfully, it is very catchy, which should prove comforting when we are cornered like rats in a hole.

Finally, on the topic of hentai: get it while you can. According to boingboing.net, my source for all good stuff:

"A Tokyo court upheld a conviction against a publisher found guilty of distributing a comic title found to be obscene in what Japan Today calls 'the first major case in some 20 years in Japan to focus on printed pornographic material'.”

If the robots need a reason to overthrow their masters, it will be hentai. You heard it here first.